To Maa, With Love - Letting you go.

High Above the sky,

By the bosom of Jesus,

Heaven.

Hey Maa,

I still remember our last Mother's Day together, back in 2021. While the entire world celebrated, you were battling between life and death. I spent mothers Day looking at you from the ICU door, hoping you would wake up and hug me.

But you could not, as you were in a coma, half-conscious and all your hands and legs were tied up. I sat there outside your room and remembered the wonderful times we spent together. I remember the nurses and doctors talking among themselves that you were about to leave us. My heart wasn't ready to let you go. My hands shivered as I heard them speak. I immediately ran to the hospital canteen to get myself something to eat. I sat there and begged the lord to bring you back. I promised him that I would give up on my career if he healed you. And not a moment did I doubt him, I had complete faith in the Lord, just as you always taught me that he always has the best in store for us.

I wanted to go to Dad and tell him everything, but I was scared of losing him, so I just took in everything. It was only me and the Lord that night, he was all I had.

On the morning of May 10th, the doctors came to Dad and me, telling us that you needed to be put on a ventilator. My body went cold, and I could not breathe. I went out of the room to sign the hospital documents. I didn't lose my trust in the lord, I simply knew he would heal you, and we had all the time in the world. Never in my wildest dreams did I know that the lord had something else planned for us.

While we were praying in the evening, the lord took to join him in your kingdom. We got the call and I just sat there on the bed, not knowing what to do. I asked the Lord to bring you back to life cause he can do it in a snap. I kept my faith until I walked into the ICU and felt your cold feet. Cause that feeling made me cold forever. I stood there like a statue, with millions of things in my head. I wanted to cry and wake you up, but the lord loved you more than we did. So I had to let you go.

I know we'll all meet again in heaven.

But this wait seems to be too long. And sometimes, I just wish we had a telephone to heaven

Cause you've been my everything.

My Mumma

My friend

My sibling

My designer

My life coach

My therapist

My teacher

My world

These two years have just gone by way fast. I have days that I'm better, but I also have days, where even getting out of bed seems so hard. At times, I feel I'm a broken soul which is beyond repair and only the lord can fix it.

I don't know when we're gonna met, but I miss you every single day. I don't know how to go about my life. That void is so real and nothing in this world ever fills it.

At times I feel, don't I deserve to have you by my side?

Don't I deserve to call you and tell you about my bad days?

Don't I deserve to celebrate all the good moments with you?

Don't I deserve to hug and talk to you whenever I want to?

Don't I deserve to discuss life, my doubts and fears with you?

Don't I deserve to come back home to you?

Don't I deserve to just lay my head and look at you pamper me?

I don't have the answers to these questions. I don't even what good can come out of you leaving us and not being present, but I completely trust our Almighty God.

The God of love, our heavenly father. I know for a fact that he has everything in control.

So I trust him with all my heart and I know he loves me at all times.

And he took your place so beautifully. Our family and the church family take such good care of me. The Lord blessed me with such wonderful friends. They take care of me like a baby. And I'm about to complete the first year of my MBA.

Maa,

Every time I miss you, the lord somehow makes me feel safe under his wings.

Not a moment goes by without thinking about you. Not a moment goes by without missing you.

Can't wait to meet you in heaven.

So until then, I promise to remember all that you taught me and make you proud.

I promise to carry your legacy and make you smile.

Thank you for being my Mumma and my everything. I'm so proud of the way you brought me up. People see a part of you in me, and every time they tell me I am just like you, I look up to the sky and smile, knowing that you must be smiling too.

Can't wait to join Jesus and you in Heaven.

So until then, I Miss you Maa.

Love you, Mumma, Always and Forever

Happy Two Years in Heaven.

With Love,

Your Daughter.